Archive for equal money system

We Require New Breed of Politicans and World Leaders.

Posted in equal money system, politics with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 3, 2011 by Author


I am continuing my investigation into the Canadian Political System, particularly the election process, as I follow the latest election that is underway here in Canada.

Today I am going to take a look at a statement made by Liberal Party leader Micheal Ignatieff within his unveiling of what is called “The Learning Passport” which is a proposed program which gives extra funding to those enrolled and who will be enrolling in post secondary education.

What I find to be quite interesting as I continue to follow the election is the “short-sightedness” of our political leaders and for that matter the people who are not only going along with this but also cheering their favourite candidate, no matter if what is being presented as ‘solutions’ is nothing more than an attempt to fix or make better our current system but that is in fact missing the point entirely of what is required to actually bring forth an actual permanent change to this world that will support in establishing a management system that support the betterment of man and the well being of all that is here.

So to help illustrate this ‘shortsightedness’ that I have been observing within the debates, topics, discussions, policies, of the election thus far I will focus on a statement made by the Leader of the Liberal Party in his unveiling his educational program.

I understand that it is not to blame politicians because from a certain perspective they are perhaps making the best out of what they had available to them such as education or family environment or the social system they were raised etc…Though at this point in time it is becoming clear that the world we have created is quite a mess, and we are going to require not just amendments to the current system but rather quite a drastic transformation of what is here in order to bring about a world that is actually dignified and ultimately valid in terms of considering the point of continuing our existence as a race. because I mean at this current rate, I am finding it difficult to justify at all why we are even Here on this planet if all we are going to do is abuse it and abuse ourselves,  and each other. So thus we need to drastically shift our political considerations, which from my perspective will take many years of re-education to effectively detangle from within ourselves the embedded belief systems/strucutres which our current politicians are at the moment acting within and that in fact only cause and create more harm and abuse and inequality within this world.

So Liberal Party Leader Micheal Ignatieff stated within his unveiling of the “Learning Passport” that no Canadian should be “denied a world class education in the machine room of the Canadian economy”

First of all he is referring to Universities and Colleges as “The Machine Room” which in itself is true to a certain extent as education within Canada has effectively become about preparing individuals to be able to perform very specific/specialized tasks so that when they finish University that they are able to walk out into the world and fill a very specific role within the already existent system. Essentially turning individuals into machines to function within the system.

He also mentioned that these Universities are the “Machine room of the Canadian Economy”.

Now this is quite a startling implication being made within this above statement by Micheal Ignatieff as within this statement has reduced education to being specifically for the “Canadian Economy”. I have a question. What happen to Life? What happen to Self Expression? Or has our entire Learning/Education process of this world become simply to prepare us to make Money within the system. Which is Exactly what is being implied within such statement as mentioned above, and what is even scarier is that this is being spoken of without him even batting an eye, meaning there is no awareness at all within the being what so ever that his/this ‘view’ of reality is not actually in alignment with actual real life in terms of a Life as that which can be considered in any way Dignified. Nope. Rather What is being implied in this statement that no Canadian should be “denied a world class education in the machine room of the Canadian economy” is that in essence all an education has become in this world is a machine room to create perfect money making machines to support the capitalistic system that we have in place. And let us not forget that this is also being considered to be “World Class” education as well.

This is why I support what Desteni Propose as an Equal Money System, because the discussion within and around Desteni and the Equal Money System are more in line with looking at how to create and educational system that if fact support the development of the human being as Life Form in where we are essentially ultimately looking at perfection. The perfection of ourselves as an expression of Life. Not fucking limiting education to that which is designed to create the best money making robots as possible.

Why are not political discussions and debates around the point of the perfection of self as Life and how to create a dignified world for all. I much rather participate with that which is aware of what life is actually and this is why I am one vote for an equal money system. Obviously this will take time to bring forth and in the end each one decide for themselves what discussions and debates they see as valid.

So if you are interested in bringing forth a world that actually consider its fellow man enough to abolish a capitalistic world system based in greed and put into place a system which give to all equally where all within this system are able to live like millionaires and actually be honoured as life then suggest to check out what Desteni is saying and presenting with an Equal Money System.

We don’t actually Need TAXES – Equal Money System Research

Posted in equal money system, Life Experiences, Re-Creating Self and this World with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 19, 2011 by Author

I read an article today in the local newspaper here focusing on a ‘issue’ related to a Taxes. The article explained how our cities Mayor has decided to not move forward with tax cuts, but rather keep everything “as is” which means, instead of the money that would have stayed in the pockets of the people under proposed tax cuts will now go into the pockets of the government which will be used for various projects the city has scheduled to undertake.

What I find interesting about this article is it illustrates how the attention of the media, of the government, of the people are all focused on this aspect of our system called “Taxes” and how best to go about implementing taxes to ensure the functionality of the system, missing altogether the point that we do not actually require taxes at all and that there is an alternative systematic approach to running a government and managing a city , country, world where we will not require taxes at all.

This is something that not many are able to consider and ver possibly would  laugh at the mere mention of this. That we actually do not require taxes.

This is from my perspective because we as people as governments are simply not educated in how this would work.

We have been raised and conditioned in this system and that this system is all we know, where we  have, so whole heartedly and completely, accepted Taxes, as a normal functioning point of Society, that cannot be done without.

Though we at Desteni Propose a System where in fact there is no Taxes what so ever. Where all members of Society are Fully Functioning  Participants, there is no homelessness, or unemployment as we know it today, All have a stable and bountiful income and any other element required in the basic development and support of the human being, in order to live a fulfilling, dignified life. Education, Housing etc. And of course there is No Taxes

This System is an Equality based system including an Equal Money System.

This is not some mumbo jumbo pipe dream utopic proposal. This is an actual Structural System able to be  implemented and operated exactly the same way as we have currently a System which has been implemented and is operating to manage the ins and outs of society and ensure that all get their daily bread etc… The problem though is that the current system we have in place (the capitalistic system) all do not get their daily bread.

I mean would you not agree that a basic function of a System that we as humanity have in place and agreed upon  to manage ourselves ensure first and foremost that each individual that is Here, is included as a consideration within the functionality of that system.

Or do you believe that we should only include some humans that are born into the system and not include millions of others and essentially just ignore them completely?

Common Sense that A system which takes ALL points into consideration would be more effective than a system that only takes some points into consideration and completely ignore other.

I see that this will however take some Education or Re-Education of Man to show that we in fact do not require such a function as Taxes. And that we are able to place a world system that actually provide for its citizens – Meaning ALL citizens of this world leaving not one child out of the equation and that within this ALL will be properly cared for, and have the basic necessities  and necessary support to live a full, dignified life.

It is up to each one to take a serious look at this world and realize that in 15 years, if we do nothing, that this world will continue heading in the same direction it is going, and that is definitely not cool. And we will effectively be standing in the same pile of shit as we are now.


We realize that WE are the ones,  the citizens, the members of this world,  who are actually creating this world, I mean we ARE the only ones on this planet.  Who else is creating, and is implementing the systems of this world But us ourselves.

So as one generation move out and a new generation move in – WHO WILL WE BE. That is entirely up to us, and it depends where we place our attention, it depends on how we educate ourselves.

If you would like to carry on with living out the same cycles over and over again, than yes, simply stand by our current way we have been doing things, Stand by the believe that we must have taxes.

Though if you are interested in learning about a New Proposed System which is able to effectively support ALL that is Here, and not only just some of us while millions die of hunger than I suggest to start to investigate what Desteni is Proposing as an Equality Based System

To find out how this will work join us  –

Re-Designing My Life

Posted in destni 'I' process, equal money system, Life Experiences, Re-Creating Self and this World, Writing Self to Freedom - Daily Writing with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 16, 2011 by Author

So I was busy sending out resumes today. I will be focusing primarily on this point until I get myself a stable job. This is Step One. A step which “went out the window” not to long after I arrived back in Canada, and by “went out the window” I mean became lost within the constant and continuous swarm of thoughts, feelings and emotions of the mind, to the point where this simplistic common sensical first step was not effectively walked or established. Humbling to say the least that it has taken me a year to get to back to step one and realize that I had not effectively placed this step.
I see that this will require diligence to effectively establish. From my perspective I should walk this basic simple step of working a consistent job for a year.
I see that I must practically design my life based on principles. And then within sticking to and walking these principles that I am actually able to change myself. I see that I had not actually effectively “placed a design” so to speak, which to ‘follow’ and because of this, I fell back into following my pre-programmed life.
Interesting. The whole point of Desteni, and Process is for one to Step Out of their pre-programmed life. This means that for every program that one is living as their pre-program, one must effectively place an “alternative” so to speak, where one essentially lay out for oneself, how they are going to walk, how they are going to communicate, how they are going to move, to sleep, to speak to shit, to breathe. How one is going to interact with others, where one is going to get money, how they will go about getting money. Everything must be considered.
One then is literally re-designing their world.
Ok so for this first “Step A” design point, I require to stabilize myself within the system by getting a regular job. This must be a full-time job working a normal 40 hour work week. A part time job will not do. That is it. It is a simple point. Yet because of my programming, if I do not deliberately place this as “what I am going to do” as a course of action, then I will then just continue to follow my programming.
Ok cool.
In terms of Content of this job. This is not priority, from the perspective that Money is the Key aspect of this element. A paycheque that comes in monthly. Content should support what is best for all within the consideration of where and how I can be most effective within process given my current placement.

At the moment I am seeing myself in Canada, where eventually I will have a House and Land. In terms of Education, I am not clear on this yet.
Points I am looking at


not necessarily in that order.

Another aspect of this re-design, is that it will be based on principle. There will be no “feeling attached” to the words as the design as the steps that I will take. It is simply using mathematics to equate what point will accumulate to the next in the equality equation and amount to what is best for all.

Anything to do with “feeling” is the mind, is my programmed life, and thus I must place the points in practical common sense, and stick to them within and as principled living.

Equality Either Lives or Dies by Your Hand.

Posted in Business and Work, destni 'I' process, equal money system, Life Experiences, Self forgiveness - Purification, Writing Self to Freedom - Daily Writing with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on March 10, 2011 by Author

I see that I wanted equality to manifest, to happen, and then YAH it would be here, be accepted and then one would be able to expressive themselves within this point of equality. Yet I missed the point of “how it would get here” I missed the point that this is actually directly related to my participation. I did not see this, even though I have been told this before, numerous times, but this point escaped me, This point as the clear blue sky became clouded and foggy and I could no longer see this point but all I see is the clouds and the fog. So there is a momentary clearing here so I am writing this down as a record of what I see. I see that Equality is directly related to my participation and expression as equality. The equality that I see and have come to understand within my participation in process is a point which not many see, and this “Not Many” is less than what I even perceive I am sure.

I see that I was waiting for equality to come.
I see that I did not see myself as the one to bring forth equality.
I see that my direct participation with and as equality is directly related to if, when, and how equality emerge.

Thus if I hold back, if I wait, then equality sit there dormant. Why…My understanding is as follows.
Because people do not understand what equality is as it is being shared in process. Equality is not programmed, meaning it has no points to connect to within the current system. It has no place in the current system. Equality does not exist within this world as this world is this system which has no room for equality…why? Because equality will destroy the system. Why would anything make room for something that will destroy it. Lol.

This world is designed to make sure than anyone which support life and self expression feels inadequate. As they become inadequate in the system as that which they support is actually not a part of the system, thus it cannot connect to the system, they cannot connect to the system and end up with not system support, no money, no voice, and perceive themselves as inadequate.

So yes I see that I had “sat back” and was waiting. Waiting for more people to come forth and support equality, not considering the point that these people do not just “come forth” but that they must be ‘gotten’ meaning, would I have even realized the point of equality if I had not see a desteni video. Unlikely as I see that the context that desteni presented was not something that I had herd anywhere before. It was as if the entire context of Desteni was “out of this world”

Equality is not pre-programmed but must be a self-directive Act. Meaning nothing is going to come to me and say “Hey please talk to me about equality” or I am not going to suddenly stumble upon some ‘outlet’, out there in the system that is a match for my equality ‘plug’ Essentially I see that I and that we within the desteni process are the source of equality and thus it is not “out there” anywhere. We are the very edge, the very outside ripple of equality expanding through our self will and self direction into an ocean that has never touched equality before.
Like giving birth to equality if those that stand for equality sit back and wait, then equality also sit back and wait.

I have yet to take an “active role” in bringing forth equality by introducing it to others, yet I now see that if I do not introduce it, if I do not bring it forward and place it into someone’s life, they will never see it. They will never have the opportunity that I had when desteni place themselves into my world through by placing the website and placing the videos.

It seems difficult at times when my entire world do not understand equality, but it is common sense that if I sit back and wait…that, because the entirety of my world is not aware of this point, that there is no point within my world that will bring this point of equality into it. Thus I cannot wait for it. I am the point within my world that must bring forth the point of equality and the emergence of equality is from this perspective my responsibility. The question is. Why do I give up and give in on this point – Do I really want equality in my world. Am I really willing to do what it takes to bring this point forth into my world so that equality does not only exist within my bedroom! But exist also in my household, my world environment, etc. If I do not ‘spread’ equality than thats it, it stops. ‘Spreading’ Equality is not preaching equality. I cannot convince someone of equality, but I can ‘introduce’ it to them. So that is the point I see. That I am able to introduce equality into my world. And that within this context, Equality either Lives or Dies by my Hand

Wanting The Future Now Instead of Directing Myself HERE

Posted in Business and Work, destni 'I' process, equal money system, Life Experiences with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 20, 2011 by Author

I experience a pressure right in the center of my back. I had this point come up a few weeks ago as well where I experienced a tension and a pressure in my back which was quite uncomfortable so now this is the second time this is coming up so am able to now see it before it happens in a way, before it compounds.
The last time this occurred it was somewhat of a new unexpected experience where now its like, “Heeeeyyyyy, I know what is going on Here”
The last time this pain point in my back compounded until I threw my back out or tweaked my back by really doing nothing but what I do most days in working on the computer etc. The point became so painful last time that I literally spent an entire day in bed watching movies as I experienced the point as a kind of “Red Light” saying slow the fuck down. Though I don’t see it in exactly the same way this time around though I am able to now see that I am heading exactly towards the same point which was a shock last time to have the pain become so bad that my back just gave out and went all stiff. Manifesting literally within only some hours. Almost as if I am holding a giant sphere made of concrete and it is soooooo heavy and I just stand there holding it and holding it and holding it until eventually my back just snap under the pressure. Its similar to this but a “mental experience” And the pressure is more “energy based” which I experience as a building pressure in the centre of my back.

Hummm – to much “Holding Back” perhaps.
Ok Perspective.
I have been doing more research over the last two days into the graphic design point exploring ways in which to set up the business. I have now been moving into this point slowly over the last three months and so am “getting there” and found this last week have placed a more pointed focus and direction onto this point to get the thing moving. Focusing specifically on the my own logo to start with and I must say I am soooooooooo enjoying working on this and exploring the Adobe illustrator program – Lots of cool points opening up here with what is possible with this programs…anyways…
Because I am in the preparation phases still I am really making sure I do the proper research and placements so that the business model/system will actually work effectively within this reality.
I find that within this there are moments that I become quite excited as I move into the explorations and start to see all this possibilities opening up of what could potentially happen and having certain realizations or seeing how points will fit together and function, and I get soooooo excited that I can hardly contain myself, I am like a wide eyed kid standing in the window of a Candy Shop. Well maybe not the best example. My experience is that I start to see different “potentials and opportunities” that could come from this direction but that these potentials are months even in some cases years away and require much much much much practical preparation, application, walking, and basically, physical direction, meaning the points actually have to be practically walked in the physical step by step, point by point thoroughly and completely and effectively in order to actually facilitate and bring through/manifest these potentials that I see possible into this physical reality in fact so that are physically Here…But I want it all, NOW, ooooooooh and I get so excited, lol.
Ok so this is where I see the pain in my back emerging from. It is a form of attempting to extend oneself/myself into the future. Which is not physically practically possible, its like I am just trying so hard to get there that I strain myself and I in fact strain myself so much that such a point like this emerge as what is happening now with my back and what happened a few weeks ago which literally sidelined me for a few days. STOP! That was the message. Its quite the same as when one have a cool insight come up in a moment and before they loose it they want to write it down real quick and so end up stumbling over the letters in a mad pace and end up with a jumbled mess with all these “red lines” underlining these funny looking words that are definitely not how you spell those words. It is basically the point of getting ahead of oneself.
So I have to remind myself that these things take time. I am not used to that, I am used to immediate results and have not actually before taken on actively the creation of “Long Term Points” which is how I see this Graphic Design Business.
I mean I can slap the thing together and have it up and going asap, but I mean WTF, rather, breathe, be Here, Stop rushing, take my time to investigate each point thoroughly and absolutely so that I build a fully intact foundation with no cracks or weak links. Rather establish the necessary relationships to ensure an effective system. And so that is what I am busy with at the moment, still in the early preparation phases of the point to see how “it could work” So there is both excitement and uncertainty, doubt, and within all this I see it is most effective to remain here within common sense practical considerations and move the point in the physical and take as much time as I require to do it effective so that it will stand and I am not attempting to make up for it later on which is a point that I see has happened on different occasions within my life.
One point I started with is using the “7 Steps of Creation” in how to create a system in this world. This “7 steps of creation” was a recording/document place by Bernard for us to use when we (matti, Cameron, Katie, Darryl, anna and me) were on The Farm exploring the point of developing the Software business. So it is a cool guideline and I have found it practical to have “a way” to do something otherwise its like I don’t have any direction so to speak. So using this “Seven Steps of Creation” as a template model in preparing the Logo Design Business has been cool support in these initial stages.
The best advice I can give myself right now is to take the necessary time that it will require to do it. Do not attempt to cut corners, slow down, if it take months more than it takes months more. Allow myself to be thorough, do not “lose my way”/”Give up” or “Lose hope” because it seems like nothing is happening, remain focused on the task at hand, and consider each and all points in detail and specificity. Don’t expect to have it done slap dash and ready to go. Breathe and focus on the points that are here and direct myself within consistency to get each point that is here moving and directed. If I access any point of rushing – that is not acceptable as that is only indicating that I am missing points. If I am not stable and calm in my application and direction, realize that I am not giving Me or the point the consideration it deserves. Why not create something for once that will stand and that will in fact work, move, and flow effectively within this world. Rather do not cut myself short by trying to take the quick version route. I simply have to walk each step in common sense – not hope, and not allow myself to go into the point of being directed by fear instead of practical common sense seeing, that is where I have to trust myself. And also to have patients, enjoy myself, and be unconditional yet ruthless on the point.

FEAR Thy Neighbor – Canada and U.S.

Posted in Crimes Against Humanity - In the News, equal money system with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 19, 2011 by Author

Most Canadians fear sovereignty sellout in border talks with U.S., poll finds

February 18th 2011
Andrew Gable

Here is an Article in today’s paper illustrating the “Mind Set” that humanity is currently locked into, existing in a “bubble” of sorts only focused on their own individual personal interest and not actually seeing at all, the “greater picture” at stake so to speak.

A recent poll found that “Two Thirds of Canadians fear Prime Minister Stephen Harper will “compromise” by giving up too much power over immigration”

The article is discussing a recent proposal between Canada and U.S to adopt common border-security controls that could lead to joint government facilities, sophisticated tracking of travelers, better cyber-security protection and improved oversight of overseas cargo shipped to both countries.

The basic point of the Article, though which was attempting to “shed some light” on some apparent important, valuable, issues facing the citizens of the nation and our future“well being” as ‘Canadians’ actually in fact Once again proved the Oblivion of the Country to the actual real issues at stake here and the greater picture at large.

Ok so what is this article showing.

That we don’t want you coming over into our side of the playground!
That’s what’s important, that’s what’s making news.

It also show “Who we have become”
Who we have become as that which drive and motivate us, that which has become so conditioned within us that we have placed it on the front pages of our newspapers and gave it the utmost value to be regarded as a important topic of discussion and here continue to fuel and support our own Self Accepted Limitation as Life, and in fact not even realize it.

Missing entirely the heart of the matter that what we are doing here is placing our own “Fear” as what is actually important, not even seeing the REAL issue…I mean don’t you find it strange that we have created our existence now into a point where we fear our neighbors. What happened to love thy neighbor? God, and I mean, even “behind the scenes” here it goes still further into the layers of deception we have placed and created into this world which we now give value you to and see as “real issues” as for example “Immigration” which is also what this article is referencing, again showing our total separation of humanity.

It is quite interesting to see that this could become an “election point” where in this “issue” can be brought up by opposition party as a way to gain the favor over the people in the next election, paying on the fears and anger and emotions of the country to win an election



Ok that was pause……………….why? – Because of what this world has come to where ‘gimicks’ and advertising are now is what is being used to form a Government to apparently run the country in the best interest of the people.

This is obviously unacceptable.

Within an Equal Money System as being proposed by Desteni there will be no such thing as opposing parties. Because there will no longer be my government against your government. Equality is the principle which An Equal Money System is based on, and thus it is simple – ALL Countries and ALL on earth will be supported equally.

Obviously we are fucking scared of our neighbors – Because our current system is not at all based in equality but rather based on fighting to the death for power and money – Of course there will be fear in a system like this.

Of course the US is attempting to Boost there power at the expense of others, and of course we are attempting to do the same thing.

Where the Fuck is equality.

Where are the negotiations, and proposals to share and distribute the resources and money of the earth to all equally showing in fact a government that is doing what is best for all and that has the best interests of this world at heart – NO WHERE.

If the Government actually did care what was best for this planet and the people on it they would not be fucking around in meaningless proposals and negotiations about strengthening the boarders and rules and boundaries of the country, which in Fact shows that we are only trying to further separate ourselves from our neighbors and secure our own individual safety and well-being.

Well at Desteni we DO have a proposal that take ALL beings on the Planet into consideration Equality as what is best for ALL, and that if there was an equal money system in place.

The negotiations would not be how to strengthen our boarders but rather how to remove them completely so we no longer live in separation from our neighbors, from other cultures so that we no longer feared other cultures.

There is no reason to have boarders. This only exist now because we did not share equally among each other but rather attempted to hoard everything to ourselves until eventually those that were starving to death came knocking on our doors.

An Equal Money System is Designed for ALL beings and for one existence. To Support ALL that exist. So that the starting point of the system that facilitate our expression and interaction has at its root “the best possible outcome for all”

Environment Changing me is Not Actual Change.

Posted in destni 'I' process, Life Experiences, Re-Creating Self and this World, Self forgiveness - Purification, Writing Self to Freedom - Daily Writing with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on February 18, 2011 by Author

I was looking at the point of what we as human beings require consequence to change. Or why we has beings, as individuals require consequence to change. Now the reason I place it this way as I have noticed this point within me where I rather than actually will myself to change my nature I rather let it play out until I hit a consequence which will then bring me to a point of actually making a ‘serious’ consideration to change my application, my participation, my nature, my behavior, myself. I place the work ‘serious’ in quotes because even though when there is a consequence I must face which then “push me” to consider change ‘seriously’ I see that I have/had not yet gone deep enough or taken this point seriously enough because what I find is that I don’t actually change. But “forget about it” until the con-sequence come around again and it is the same point over again.
So no matter how hard I look or take seriously the point of change, I end up forgetting and back to the same ol’ patterns. And even saying to myself to watch out for forgetting because I have been through that before, yet end up forgetting.
When I left the Desteni Farm I was a different person. And what I have found is that since being back in Canada I have really faced myself. Because now from a certain perspective I am in the “Matrix”, lol, that sounds so epic, lol.
So Here is how the story goes. I create myself within and in relation to and along with my environment for 26 years. Then, I am taken from that environment and placed into a completely new environment on the Desteni Farm. Then I start to apparently change which is all fine and cool, and I spend two years in this new environment and experience myself differently in that for this two years I participate within the world not like I had previously. Ok cool so now there is some “change occurring”.

Then take me out of this new environment and place me back in my old environment and what do you suppose happens. I go back to how I was living before – So what does this show me. That I in fact had not changed. From a certain perspective there was a process of change occurring but within looking at the point I see that this was more of an external change where I was more changing in response to my environment as a kind of from the outside moving inward kind of change. So when the Environment changes then I change, seeing as how the “Change” I experienced on the Desteni Farm was largely from the outside in.

I mean if would have taken a point on from the very centre core of myself and changed, more from the perspective of changing me from the very starting point of me…well not “from the perspective of” but rather had actually in fact gotten to the very beginning of me then it would not matter where you place me, and what environment I am in as the change that would be occurring would be from the inside out, and thus the change would be actually be a Self Change.

So in many ways this is the point I am seeing with regards to how I have attempted change and that no matter how serious I am about it that I always end up forgetting, as the change is more of an idea and the one Key Factor I see that I am missing is Knowing who I am and actually living and existing as myself here within breath. Because if I am Not Here, then how is change supposed to happen if I am no where to be found, how then am I supposed to change.

So from a certain perspective the point I am busy with now is not “changing” per se but rather ‘getting to self’ and being here with self, living and walking that self in every breath, so I can actually walk a point of change. And all it takes is one second and one moment to flee, to abandon myself and off into the mind, and actually not even realize it.

I noticed even today I was not Here, yet I was almost Here – lol. Because when I am Here, I know it, but today there exist within me this “point off in the distance” like “what is that” and so I go just looking out over there, just trying to see what it is out there, and in this slight diversion I miss ME all day. So specific.

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